You guys ain't got nothin' on us!

I don't know about you, but I get pretty sick of hearing men talk about how bad it hurts when they get hit in the (you know). I am especially irritated by the drop to the ground and writhing about when it happens as well. Besides the lovely sensation of giving birth, we girls have other areas that make me want to tell those wimpy men: you ain't got nothin' on us!

The other day I was nursing my daughter. Poor thing had been sick with a cold and was snarling at me when....she bit me with her nasty little gummers! Oh my gosh did that hurt. So I yelled, "that hurt" and warned her if she did it again, I might not be feeding her anymore. Incidentally, I've had this conversation a few times with her. My husband was lying in bed and said to me in an admonishing tone, "she's sick, she can't help it." To which I replied, "how would you like it if she bit one of your testicles?" He looked stunned and said, "why do you have to go there?" I was thinking 'ditto'.

Wanted: Cheerleaders!

After having Julia, I haven't been able to lose much weight. I'm sure the 10 or 11 Oreos I eat late at night doesn't help either. I used to be slim but now I feel like a disgusting blob. I ordered P90X after hearing really good things about it from others who had tried it. In fact, I have a friend who has lost about 110lbs by doing the exercises.

I started watching the videos yesterday and I am dying I tell you!!! I am so out of shape - bleh. Geez, who knew an extra 20 lbs would kick your butt!?! I started the program before getting pregnant with Julia, but did way too much on the leg video and could barely walk. I figured it was time to quit when I became too afraid to walk down stairs for fear of falling, my legs were so tight. I need to stick with it this time though. I even took pictures for "before and after" purposes. Ughhhh... what a disgusting reality that was! I need a cheerleading team to help me stick with it because the videos are an hour long and 5-6 days a week. Bring on the cheerleaders, please!!!

Photos of Julia

Okay, okay...I'm terrible at this blogging stuff but cut me some slack, I just had a baby and she was colicky.

We are doing much better now. Now that she's over her crying phase (crying all day for hours at a time) I can really enjoy her sweet personality. Poor thing must have been in serious pain to be so miserable. I remember holding her, rocking her while she cried and feeling so helpless that I couldn't make it better for her in some way. I tried everything! Holistic medicine, Western medicine, diet, you name it. Nothing seemed to work except for some Prilosec which calmed her down a tiny bit.

Anyway, I am so grateful she is doing better. I can interact with her now. I love it when she coos and smiles at me. My husband says shes flirting - I call it giving you the "googly eyes." She smiles and coos and her eyes are so bright and happy - it's so wonderful! She's such a doll and such a blessing in my life. I wanted to post some pictures my talented friend, Katie, took of her. I will be blogging more often now that I have some cry-freetime. So, expect more posts coming soon.

That's my girl!

We went to Disneyland the beginning of December. Its my favorite time of the year to go there. They have it decorated so beautifully. It makes the park more magical than it already is. But, we were very hesitant about going this year because Julia has been so difficult. We have a pet name for her...the Raptor.

For those of you who haven't seen me in Church, its because my daughter is a total night owl. Not only is she up late at night, she cries a lot. She has the text book definition of colic times 3. She cries pretty much non-stop from about 5 or 6 p.m. until 1 a.m. Sometimes we get lucky and she takes cat naps during that time - around 30 minutes or so. But, she does sleep straight from about 1 a.m. to 6 a.m. which is nice. She doesn't really nap in the day except for a couple of cat naps as I've said.

Anyhoo...we were worried about going to Disneyland. Getting stuck in line or on a ride with a screaming baby didn't seem at all appealing. But, I promised the other kids we'd go so we did. SHE WAS AN ANGEL! She slept the entire time except to nurse. In fact, for three days after the trip, she had (sort of) a normal baby schedule. She is back to her hold screaming routine but I am so grateful for those 3 days of bliss and a great time at Disneyland. I think we'll go more often. :P

Like how she's in Maleficent's horns?

Already into High School Musical - bleh

Peaceful sleep!

Baby Julia

So I was finally induced on Wednesday the 28th. She weighed 8 lbs, 2 oz and is totally awesome and healthy!

Labor story:

They put me on Pitocin which wasn't too bad until they ramped it up. At first, I was fine. I didn't want to get an epidural this time as I have blood pressure problems with the medicine. Anyway, I had a doula who was just wonderful and she really helped me get through most of the labor. After the Pitocin was up pretty high, I felt the contractions becoming more effective. I started feel like I was going to throw up. The nurse midwife came in after I almost lost my cookies in the trash can and checked me...I was only 2 cm but fully effaced. I was 2 cm when I walked into the stupid hospital. I was crushed! I knew I couldn't take 4 more hours of the pain I was trying to cope with. I begged for an epidural.

The anesthesiologists came pretty quickly as the hospital was having a slow night. The Dr. was giving me the whole informed consent, don't sue me, spiel while I was nodding and hurrying him along. My husband said he'd never seen anybody put an epidural in as fast as this guy did. I didn't have any trouble with the medicine but as soon as I laid down on the bed, I had to push. The stupid epidural hadn't even kicked in. But, I COULD NOT wait for anybody, not even the midwife to show up. I started pushing like no tomorrow.

At this point in time it was only my husband, the nurse and the doula in the room. The nurse called for the midwife and was absolutely panicked as nobody expected me to be pushing that fast. Also, I had pushed part of the water bag out which was still in tact. Isn't that weird and disgusting? Anyway, I basically went from 2 to 10 cm in 20 minutes!!! The nurse couldn't get a hold of the midwife so she called in the M.D.s from the floor. Right as they came in, my midwife came running in. I guess the page system didn't work. Anyway, as I pushed again, the midwife informed me that the baby had pooped in the bag and had meconium all over her head. Yum! Next thing I know there were 4 perinatologists in the room waiting to take care of the baby. They were so calm, I didn't feel scared about the situation at all. Plus, I was in too much pain to care that much.

When I really started pushing I felt this horrible burning sensation. I was SO not prepared for that. I took a birthing class that totally helped with the contractions but did not prepare me for the ring of fire!!! I was yelling, "get it out" and asking whether they could give me something to numb up the area. They couldn't b/c she was crowning. I dropped the f bomb left and right. When I watched the birth video, it surprises me that nobody laughed as it was actually kind of funny.

I probably pushed 2 more times and she was out. Despite the fact they were worried about her b/c of the meconium, they put this bloody, purple baby on my chest for about 1 min and then took her over to the specialists to make sure she was okay. I thought that was pretty awesome. Her hair was totally green b/c of the poop. She looked like a leprechaun. But, she was healthy and crying.

Everybody at the hospital was so great and supportive. I'm glad I had the experience of having a baby naturally. In retrospect, I don't think I would do it again lol. I did ask for the epidural, it just didn't have time to kick in. It was a great experience and my last one barring any unforeseen "accident." I hope everybody likes the pictures. Oh, check out all her blonde hair!

Yes, I'm still here!

Bah! I haven't had the baby and my midwife won't induce me. I'm getting pretty dang uncomfortable but most of all I'm so tired of people asking me, "you're still here?" I want to say, "no, I'm only a figment of your imagination" or "no, I had the baby and stuffed a pillow under my shirt just to trick you." I think the "you're still here" is worse than, "you're so big." That one is just plain rude but I think I'm more frustrated by the fact I'm still pregnant. The worst offenders are the people at church. I've been ducking out after sacrament so I don't get trapped by them in the halls afterward. Bad, but I'm keeping pregnancy rage at bay so it'll do.

I decided to use a nurse midwife for this baby because I have a bad reaction to the epidural. I didn't realize she was going to make me stay pregnant for 2 extra weeks! I'm seriously debating breaking my own water. Not really, but it sounds threatening, doesn't it? I'm hoping and praying she will deliver me a week after my due date. Oh, I'm not really sure when that is because they've changed it 3 times. Originally it was the 26th but ultrasound at 7 weeks said 24th then, ultrasound at 13 weeks said the 19th. The midwife was using the 24th but when I asked to be induced last week (I know, I know, a teense bit early :P) she said I wasn't due until the 26th!!! I think she used the longest date just to shut me up.

Anyway, I'm going to beg and plead with her next week and will hope for a Halloween baby, at the latest! Pray that everything will be alright for the baby and I will be able to hold on to the last vestiges of my sanity.

The end of rotten things

This pregnancy has been so rough! I was so nauseous until about 6 mos. I can't believe it went on that long - bleh. Right around the time I started to feel better, my dad died. It was horrible. He was only 66 years old and my best friend. I am the executrix of his estate and it was really hard going through all of his stuff. I miss him so much and sometimes call his phone number even though I know he won't answer.

I am so grateful for all the good people in the Church who helped me move his things out of his house. He lived in Alpine and we had to move everything in the middle of July when it was sweltering. Nobody complained - they just came and helped. I have NO idea how I would have done any of that had it just been me and Victor.

Shortly after losing my dad, I had all sorts of problems with my ex-husband while my two older boys were visiting him. He really did a brain washing number on them and I was concerned he wouldn't send them back after his whopping one month of time with them. (He only takes them one month a year - great dad eh?) I actually had to pay for lawyers and send him a pretty nasty letter about it right when I was trying to take care of my dad's affairs.

About a month ago, after the end of all this stress, I was about ready to beg the Dr. to induce me so I could have a stiff drink or something (not really but I thought about it). I was so uncomfortable - heartburn every night, gas, constipation, couldn't breath, felt tired and THEN...the baby dropped! This was the turning point. Right at about 36 weeks, she dropped and I could sit without being in pain, feeling like my ribs were up in my chest. I could move around better, eat without feeling full after two bites, and I had more energy. THEN, the weather changed! It was BLAZING hot out here. It was relentless 100 degree heat. It was awful. The weather changed to the 70's and it was just beautiful! This last week it has been cloudy with a little bit of sun and is total Fall weather. I love it!

It's interesting because usually the last month is the worst for most people but it has been the absolute greatest for me. I'm still uncomfortable but I feel so much better and all those horrible things are behind me (I hope). I don't know how I would have gotten through everything without being able to kneel with my husband and ask for the Lord's blessing and guidance. While all of it was pretty awful, it was bearable. Now, I am so grateful for the many blessings in my life - for this new little sweet baby who will be here shortly and for the lessons I've learned about not worrying about the little things. Who has time to worry about those things when you feel rotten or have terrible tragedy in your life?

I know this was kind of a rant but I feel like this whole rotten period of my life has come to an end. I've learned a lot but more than anything I am so grateful for my family, how wonderful my children and husband are, and for my Church family, who are always there when you need them most. I am so looking forward to my life keeping on in the direction its going - until I hit the next speed bump lol.